Who Am I? Part Twenty Four


Just prior to moving into Sad Steve’s place, another friend of mine, Rob, approached me and said he was looking for a lodger. I told him that I was looking to move, but after we agreed that I would rent a room from him, he had big problems in his personal life and it all fell through. However, it would rear its head again before long. So, I was doing well in the spiritual development group in Gloucester and I had moved into Sad Steve’s house. So far, so good.

Another friend of mine, Jacqui, that I knew from working on the call centre, had left the company, taken her kids and moved to Swansea to do a university course. Jacqui was a single mum and I’d always admired the way she took life by the scruff of the neck every time it tried to batter her down. We had got on well and kept in touch, and we had arranged for me to go and visit her; it was during the time in the UK when we have three bank holidays in quick succession, but I can’t remember which particular one it was. A day or two before I was due to set off, I had a phone call from John Geis. He asked what I was doing on the coming Saturday at around 11:00 am. I said I was going to Wales; why? He said he wanted me to come to the centre because they “wanted to bring me on spiritually”. I thought, “how convenient”, I had to drive right past the centre on my way to Swansea. I felt rather pleased with myself; I was obviously doing so well in the group that they wanted to elevate me to new heights. Well, it wasn’t quite like that…

When I got there I was ushered into the healing room, where I saw four chairs arranged in a circle. There was John, his wife Sue, and another lady who had been going to the centre for a long time. We sat around in a circle and John laid it on me. There had been a healing workshop at the centre a few weeks previously, and a lady that I’d worked with during the course of the day had told John and Sue that she’d felt something really negative around me. John and Sue have ways of investigating these things and they proceeded to tell me that I had several negative entities attached to me. They also explained the implications and went on to say that in all likelihood, they had been there for many years. It explained so much. This would have contributed greatly to the terrible depression that I experienced; it explained not being able to get to sleep during my darkest times, it explained the intensity of the pain I experienced and it also explained how my mood could change so quickly. These are all classic symptoms of entity attachment. People who don’t understand the concept of having entities, either attached to a property or a person, tend to call these things poltergeists or evil spirits.

It seems I’d been summoned in order that John, Sue and the other lady could carry out what we call “rescue work”. In other words, they would remove the spirit attachments and send them back to the light in order that they too could carry on their spiritual journey. Religion tends not to understand this kind of thing and still employs the extremely cruel and outdated method of exorcism. Exorcism simply invokes horrendous energies that chase the “stuck” soul away. Exorcism does not guide lost souls back to the light, so all that happens is that they end up somewhere else and have to start all over again. Normally, if an entity is in a house and causing ructions, it’s not because it’s evil. It’s simply trying to attract attention because it needs help. Of course there are exceptions to the rule, but that is a story for another day. It was an interesting experience, which once commenced, was over quite quickly. This was yet another step forward.

Some weeks later it emerged that there was another stage of cleansing that I had to go through that would finally allow me to leave my old sad self behind. This was something that came along unexpectedly and it wasn’t very nice. We were sitting in our development circle one Tuesday night, and during one of our meditations, I had the most horrific experience. It is not relevant to go into details but I can explain the concept. Imagine that a motorbike has revved up and driven away. The bike is soon out of sight, but you can still hear the engine in the distance, and even as the sound of the engine fades away, you can still smell the exhaust fumes. Well, that is the same principle as what I experienced. I’d had a lot of inner “stuff” dissolved via a combination of the operation in Chelmsford, the removal of the entities and the discipline of attending the development group and my own meditation regime. However, the exhaust fumes of my past were still hanging around; and it was the dissipation of these exhaust fumes that gave me the very unpleasant experience during the meditation. But the blackness from the cesspit that had formed within my soul was now gone forever. I was free from my past.

Before long I started to go out with Sue and John when they were serving Spiritualist churches. I would do the reading, if it was a Divine Service, and also one or two mediumistic messages. Come June 2002 I was out on my own. Then by the end of 2002 I was asked to run a development group of my own in Trowbridge. I was suddenly extremely busy. I was working full-time, sitting in the development group on Tuesdays (except if I had a church booking as a medium), I was running my own group every other Wednesday and I was serving churches at weekends (although it was not every weekend). It was still a very busy life, and in march 2002 another change was instigated.

I was at work one day at the utility company when the phone rang. I was surprised to hear that it was Rob on the other end. He wanted to know what my living situation was. I told him I was living at Sad Steve’s and how it was driving me up the wall. He apologised profusely for what had happened before and said that things had changed and he was looking for a lodger. His relationship had broken up (again) and he wanted someone he knew and trusted. Rob and I knew each other from the gym, we had become friends through our common interest of being fans of Chelsea FC. I accepted his offer. It was again very cheap, although not quite as cheap as Sad Steve and there would be none of this “no visitors after 9:00 pm” rubbish. Living at Steve’s had served a purpose, but it was now time to move on. Living with Rob was not without its problems and in October 2003 I was on the move again. Watch this space; we are heading for some incredible times…

 

Advertisements

An Hour & A Half; 90 Minutes Or A Lifetime? Part Two


As you would have gathered by the previous article the evening of April 3 wasn’t exactly a bundle of fun.  But to the writer, evenings such as this can be a God-send in the long-term because they inspire creativity.  With this in mind, it seemed like a great opportunity to give you further insight into the process of mediumship.  Also, a friend of mine in Slovenia had a number of queries (valid ones) that I shall endeavour to answer in the following few paragraphs.  I will also take the opportunity here to explode a few myths.

It’s a common misconception that mediums can just pluck information out of thin air, and are in constant communication with the realms of higher vibration.  Nothing, in fact, could be further from the truth.  Firstly, any decent medium will make sure they are closed as they go about their day-to-day business.  Believe me, you really don’t want it “there” all the time.  From time to time you do come across people who will tell you that they are in constant communication with their “guides” and who are always trying to shove some kind of hair-brained message down the throat of anyone who will listen.  If you come across this, in virtually every single case that person is simply communicating with lower energies who have attached themselves to them.  In a nutshell, if you have got a constant jabber, jabbering going on in your head or you are constantly having clairvoyant pictures flashing through your mind, then there is something seriously wrong.  A good medium will be disciplined and will know intuitively the difference between negative vibrations and vibrations of a pure nature.  A good medium will remain intuitively connected to the Divine and will not feel the need to show others how great they are by the constant churning out of messages.

Going back to April 3, there was a number of things going on in that room that made the evening one to forget, as far as the clairvoyance went.  But nonetheless, they give a good insight to the uninitiated as to how a demonstration of mediumship can be sabotaged.  There are certain conditions that you need in order for things to run smoothly.  If you have all of those things in place then you really are laughing, but you can get by normally by just having a few of them in place.  Firstly, in an ideal world your venue would have a really good energy, but as already stated, the energy in that pub was probably the most negative I have ever encountered.  Secondly, you would always hope that your audience are going to be warm and open to working with you.  Sadly, they were also probably the most negative audience I have ever encountered.  Thirdly, you need people to respond to you; you need the vibration of their voice.  When you just get blank stares it makes life nigh-on impossible.  It’s also not good when people sit with their arms folded when you speak to them.  The reason being that “who we really are” nestles within our heart centre.  The medium is in a heightened state of awareness and the info coming from the astral realms also has a higher vibration, so the sitter needs to be open-hearted so that the three-way link can be created; in other words, we actually communicate via the heart, so if you sit with your arms folded you are blocking the energy.  I remember going to one particularly grumpy old man sitting at the back, who sat arms folded and with a face like thunder all the time I was trying to work with him; and he was one of the more receptive ones.

Finally, you would also hope that no one brings their own negative entity attachments in with them.  Unfortunately, I had this to contend with as well.  Another man sitting at the back seemed to be constantly in communication with unseen forces himself.  When this happens it interferes with the medium’s link and makes things very difficult.  It got to the point where I couldn’t quite believe what was happening, but I saw it as a challenge and thought the best course of action was to hang in there and keep going.  You just have to work with what you have, it’s as simple as that.  But ideally, you would want a venue with good energy and an audience/congregation who are seeking some kind of spiritual enlightenment, as opposed to just wanting a message; which brings me onto my friend’s queries.

I was asked why I would be doing spiritual work in a pub, why there was teenage girls in the audience and why I felt that clairvoyance had nothing to do with spirituality.  So, for my friend in Slovenia and anyone else outside of the UK I will deal with these issues one at a time.

Firstly, meetings such as clairvoyant evenings have been taking place in the UK for many, many years; probably as far back as the 1800’s.  In the early days they would be raided by the police and mediums would be persecuted.  But for many years now such meetings have become a normal part of life.  Quite often, the people who run them have difficulty finding a suitable hall.  Maybe there aren’t any in the area, or all the decent ones are already taken, so sometimes they have no option but to book a function room in a pub.  However, in this particular instance it was the proprietors of the pub who were running the event.

Secondly, it is quite normal in the UK to have youngsters at these events.  In a lot of the Spiritualist churches people take their kids and even their dogs; it’s actually great to see when families all come together.  The behaviour of those particular teenage girls was actually a rarity.  To be perfectly honest I have had much more problematic evenings because of the childish antics of adults, and what with all the other stuff going on, a few giggling girls was the least of my problems that night.

Finally, my comments about clairvoyance and spirituality were meant in the context of such evenings.  I will endeavour to explain.  As I said in the previous article, clairvoyant evenings tend to attract people who are not looking for spiritual enlightenment.  They go along for a number of reasons.  Maybe just to see what it’s all about, to get a message or maybe with a group of friends to “have a laugh”.  When I said that clairvoyance has nothing to do with spirituality, I meant that simply churning out messages from fairly low levels of the astral plains to people who are not interested in spiritual enlightenment, has indeed got absolutely nothing to do with spirituality.  On the other hand, those who seek enlightenment can of course benefit greatly from their own clairvoyant faculty, either through the bliss of meditation or simply by being in tune with who they really are.  My comment was meant purely in the context of such events that are referred to as “clairvoyant nights” here in the UK.

To end this article I will just elaborate a bit more on why I reacted the way I did.  I was really knocked sideways when I realized I was in for such a rough ride, but as stated, I quickly also realized that I was being tested.  So at the same time as trying to make the best of a bad job, I had a lot of other stuff going through my mind.  I thought about all the quotes I post on social media about tolerance, forgiveness and practising what you preach.  I thought about Baba’s teachings with regard to loving those who want to hurt you and being able to see God in EVERYONE.  I thought about how Baba had literally given his whole life in service of mankind; never complaining and ALWAYS being there for us.  I thought about what Baba had done for me personally and I also thought about the sacrifices made by Christ, Gandhi, and in more recent times, Nelson Mandela.  Taking all that into account was I really going to let my ego win when faced with something so trivial by comparison?  There was only one answer, and I left the venue a happy man and stronger for the experience.

I think I can safely say that I’ve put the night of April 3 behind me now; but watch out for more posts on similar subjects.