Who Am I? Part Thirty Two


And then it happened… Absolutely nothing… Or did it?

A typical darshan in Sai Kulwant Hall

I just love that line; it’s actually how I’m going to end this post, at 21 December 2012, but I love it so much that I thought I would kick off with it as well. Anyway.. I went back to Prashanthi Nilayam in February 2010. It was a completely different experience from the first time. I went with a friend who had a medical condition that meant she was in a great deal of pain most of the time. We unwittingly booked our trip to coincide with Maha Shivaratri (Night of Shiva), which is one of the busiest festivals of the year. The village and the ashram were even more busy than when I went in 2009. Because of my friend’s constant pain we felt that the conditions on the ashram would be a bit harsh for her, so we found accommodation in the village; directly opposite a shop that sold themed T-shirts. The premises also doubled as a workshop where they put the motifs on the T-shirts themselves; the constant noise from the sewing machine was deafening!

Swami’s physical form was noticeably frailer, but his power was as immense as ever. During the course of our 10 day stay it was made clear to me that I did not need to go there again. Swami has his ways of letting you know; it was as if he was silently confirming that wherever you are in the world, you, yourself, are the One indivisible whole. If I am One with Swami, why would I need to travel thousands of miles to be in his physical presence?

In 2006, whilst living in Cirencester, I’d found Sai groups in Bristol and Swindon that I started to attend. Later on I found another group in Bath that resonated better with me. However, you may remember right at the beginning of this series of posts, I said that I’d always felt that I didn’t belong anywhere? No matter where I found myself, I always felt that I didn’t belong. When I was younger I didn’t understand why, but now I was beginning to understand more about who I really was and why I always felt like a fish out of water. I’d never felt any resonance with Spiritualism, I’d never felt that I belonged in the army and in many of my jobs in adult life; I’d got used to the idea of being quite the loner. In spite of this I was a bit disappointed to find that I felt exactly the same in the Sai groups too. Even though I met some lovely people, like Satyan, who was like a brother, and Patrick, they were very formal groups. Nonetheless, I would continue to attend sporadically for a few years to come.

I found that after my visits to Swami I started to undergo some quite drastic changes, both in day-to-day life and spiritually. I noticed that I was feeling extremely fatigued for no apparent reason. After I’d had this feeling for around 18 months, I mentioned it to Satyan one day during a visit to Bath. He said I needed to go for some urgent blood tests as it might be something serious. Satyan knows his onions, so I quickly made an appointment at my local surgery to see a nurse. I had the most extensive blood tests I’ve ever had in my life; she must have taken five vials of blood. But when the results came back, there was absolutely nothing wrong with me. My GP said I probably had a mild form of Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. I will never forget what else he said to me, and I quote, “we don’t know what causes it and there is no cure, so you will just have to get on with it”! So I did, and I have been ever since. At some stage I learned that extreme fatigue is one of the many “symptoms” people experience when they are going through the spiritual awakening process.

I’d had a daily routine of meditation for about the last seven years, but it had got to the stage where it was starting to feel quite mechanical, and I’d started to question the validity of it. All of a sudden I found that I was no longer meditating and to this day, I very rarely meditate at all anymore. I was also used to seeing my spirit guides and getting spirit communication on quite a regular basis. Suddenly, I no longer saw my guides and spirit communication was a thing of the past. I found that when I went to serve a church or centre, I would no longer go through my routine of preparation. I would simply turn up, when I stood up my mediumship would kick-in, and when I was called to time it would shut down until the next time. There was now a divide between me and the religion of Spiritualism that was probably wider than the Grand Canyon, but I felt that a power much greater than me wanted me to continue in this environment. At first, I didn’t understand why I could no longer see or hear spirit guides.

I had always known, that ultimately, spirit guides do not exist, as there is only One Consciousness. But like a lot of things when you are unconscious, the actual meaning and implications take some time to sink in. I eventually realised that I was in the process of evolving from my illusory perspective of duality, to one of monism. I had already found that several of the Spiritualist churches and centres were no longer booking me; this had a lot to do with them feeling that my addresses were too deep and profound and people didn’t understand them. The fact was, that I only knew one way to work; and that was the way that I was being guided by Divine Spirit. So, I was in a situation where a Divine Service in a Spiritualist church was an ideal platform for me to work from, because there was always the part of the service where the medium was required to give an address. But at the same time, most people were only interested in “messages from beyond”, so there were many who didn’t like the way I worked.

As far as day jobs went, my support worker job in Avening was past its sell-by date and I knew I needed to move on. I got a similar job with another organisation, which at first seemed like a breath of fresh air, but within a matter of weeks I realised I’d gone from the frying pan into the fire, and five months later I’d moved on. Then, for my sins, I got  a job in a “hotel” in Tetbury. It was an awful place; not cheap for the punters, and it was nothing more than a glorified pub. I stayed there until January 2011, after which I decided to have another go at being self-employed.

The morning of Sunday, April 24, apart from being Easter Sunday, was just another day. I got up and had my usual cups of tea, and then logged into my laptop to check emails and social media accounts. There was an email from my friend V in South Africa. It simply said, “Swami has gone”. I cried sporadically for most of the day, not out of grief, but out of the sheer joy of knowing that the God-man blessed me beyond my wildest dreams since entering my life way back in 2001. I have a tear or two in my eyes now as type. He had deteriorated drastically since the last time I was in Prashanthi, but devotees the world over had just assumed that Swami would come back as good as new. Baba’s message was always that the body is only temporary and that devotees should not worship his physical form. He had also said words to the effect of, “one day you will have to get used to this body not being here”. I said at the time that a physical form had never been intrinsic to the relationship I had with Swami, so there was no reason for anything to change now.

During the early morning of July 17 2012, I had an incredible experience with Swami in astral form. I grabbed his arm and it was as solid as solid can be. You can read the full account by clicking on this link – When The Avatar Comes Calling

Now speaking of 2012. You remember, don’t you? When the world was going to end? Well, during the build up I wrote a few spoof blog posts. If you click on the links below, you may or may not be amused by what you read:

Angels Ate My Hamster

Aliens Ate My Grandmother

After leaving the hotel in January 2011, I bumbled along; just managing to keep my head above water. I’d published more books with the advent of “on demand digital publishing”, which enabled me to publish without having to order hundreds of copies. It was a struggle but I learned from my mistakes and did most of the work myself. Cover design, formatting of text etc. I didn’t have very good equipment, so for some of the technical stuff I had to pay for services. But it was all OK. I never had fantastic sales, but there is nothing for an author quite like the buzz you get, when someone from the other side of the world contacts you and says that reading your book changed their life! Money just cannot buy that!

So, 2011 became 2012, and I continued to bumble. The months went by and before we knew what was happening we were into December, and in the blink of an eye the dreaded witching hour was upon us. The 21st loomed…

And then it happened… Absolutely nothing… Or did it?

 

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The Transitory Phenomenon We Call Life


The nature of our relationship with creation is that of subject/object. The mind (subject) constantly seeks out objects in the world and interacts with them; objects can be things or people. It then draws a series of conclusions and opinions around the interaction, which determine whether we are happy, sad or indifferent with the experience. Relationships are so-called because we all exist in relation to each other. When two people are in love; genuinely in love, it is not because they are in a relationship with each other. It is actually because the soul connection between the two is so strong, that the illusion of the subject/object relationship has broken down and dissolved away, allowing the two souls to merge in Love with each other and experience the oneness of consciousness. This is a great paradox of life; we are only in a relationship when the relationship has broken down!

The subject/object relationship is what is also known as duality; the illusion that things and people exist separately and independently. The only reality is consciousness, however, when consciousness has its dancing shoes on, objects rise up and appear to exist independently of everything and everyone else. But all that rises up must also dissolve away; this is the transitory phenomenon that we call Creation.

Why Psychic And Clairvoyant Powers Can Be A Barrier To Spiritual Development – Part Two


???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????Following on from my previous post, Part One, I’d just like to tie up a few loose ends. (if you missed it click on the link http://wp.me/p1qAeL-rbk). I stated that when we become attached to experiencing clairvoyant, mediumistic and psychic phenomena, it can hinder our spiritual growth; as opposed to enhancing it, which is a widely believed myth. So, what then, is the best way to progress and evolve spiritually? Firstly, allow me to digress slightly.

I mentioned in the previous post a number of examples as to why such phenomena do become a hindrance. But using the example of mediumship to demonstrate my point, I stated that for mediumship to occur there needs to be a messenger, a receiver of the message and the message itself. This is duality, and as such, is nothing more than an illusion. So, thinking along the same lines, something else occurred to me recently with regard to my astral adventures. (please click on this link for an account of my most recent and, what was one of my most spectacular ever, out-of-body experiences http://wp.me/p1qAeL-rb2).

Even though my adventures are nothing short of amazing, in the grander scheme of things, they too are illusory. There is the astral experience and the one having the experience (me), this is also duality and therefore an illusion. In infinite consciousness the experience and the experiencer are One; there is no separateness. So, even though I’m having these experiences on the astral planes, they are still occurring below the plane of Self-realisation and are therefore only happening within my astral mind. I also stated that the astral planes are a vast extension of the physical plane and subject to the same natural laws. This means that as well as creating my physical life with my thoughts, actions and spoken word, I am also creating my astral life; as are you. The only unusual thing is that for some reason I am being given a glimpse of this whilst still having “business” to attend to on the physical plane. It’s possible that I’m evolved enough to have these spectacular experiences, but not yet evolved enough to consciously choose the experience. Anyway, back to spiritual development.

We grow spiritually through our actions and experiences in daily life; that is a simple truth, and probably the most powerful way to kick-start your spiritual development is to practice forgiveness. The practice of forgiveness is a most wonderful springboard from which we can go on to greater things. Forgiveness is the letting go of the past. When we let go of the past we are able to evolve, and when we evolve we grow spiritually. Also, carrying out simple acts of kindness in a selfless manner is another extremely powerful method of spiritual development. These practices bring us far closer to our true nature than you would imagine, and the closer and closer we get to our true nature, the more the veil of ignorance is lifted. As truth reveals itself, illusion dissolves away. This is a continuous process, the culmination of which is the realisation that not only is there nothing in existence except infinite consciousness, but that “I Am” infinite consciousness.

Why Psychic And Clairvoyant Powers Can Be A Barrier To Spiritual Development

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10497_487005687979215_193773654_nContrary to popular opinion, having psychic or mediumistic abilities is no indicator of spiritual advancement; in fact, it can actually be a hindrance to spiritual development. What many do not realise is that psychic and clairvoyant experiences take place at a level which is well below the plane of Self-realisation; therefore at best they can be nothing more than an illusion; just another game in the play of life. Most people who know me will be aware that I have worked as a platform medium for many years, and so may find that statement very difficult to comprehend; a medium saying that mediumship is nothing more than an illusion! What next? I’ve been aware of this truth for several years now and I realise that all I’m doing is going through the motions for the sake of appeasing the logical minds of those who wrongly believe they have “lost” loved ones. I suppose I’d better explain my thinking…

Firstly, I’m going to use an analogy my good friend, Michael Walters, coined a few years back. Michael says that life is like an onion; consisting of many layers. As we evolve, every now and then, one of those layers peels away and reveals a truth that was always there, it’s just that we couldn’t see it. As truth reveals itself, old, stale mindsets and beliefs simply dissolve away. They dissolve away because they are illusory and not true. They never were true; we simply made them our reality because we believed it to be so. With this in mind it’s fair to say that the onion, which is my life, has been peeling away layers in the last few years at an unbelievable speed.

So, what is clairvoyance? It is a series of temporary experiences that occur in the mind. This tells us that in order to experience clairvoyance we have to engage the mind. The mind is the ego, which falsely identifies with the body therefore what we experience is an illusion; it is transient and not true. If you have a clairvoyant experience there must be an object (your clairvoyant vision). If there is an object, there must also be a subject (the one having the vision). This is separateness (duality), which is an illusion. In infinite consciousness the object and the subject are one and the same; in ultimate truth nothing exists except infinite consciousness, which is One.

We also need to understand that in order to have a clairvoyant experience, the experiencer must be in communication with the astral planes. The astral planes are a vast, kind of extension, to the physical plane and are subject to the same natural laws. This means that the astral planes are subject to relativity, which in turn means that your experience of clairvoyance may be negative as well as positive. Similar conditions apply with regard to mediumship. You have a messenger, the one receiving the message and the message itself; this is another example of duality; in infinite consciousness the messenger, the receiver and the message are one and the same; there is no separateness.

As for psychic powers, they simply relate to the karmic pathway and like clairvoyance and mediumship, they will only exist when the mind falsely identifies with the body. Of course, it is true to say that if you are reading this and you have experienced any kind of psychic phenomenon, it is an indicator that you are starting to wake up to the reality of who you really are. Problems occur however, when people start to have these experiences and wrongly believe that they are the be-all-and-end-all. They develop attachments to the experiences and want them continuously, oblivious to the fact that such experiences are only ever going to be a stepping stone to Self-realisation. When we develop such attachments, and remain in the psychic and clairvoyant planes, it forms a barrier and keeps us in ignorance of our true nature.

Is it not a no-brainer? Why would you want to settle for a lettuce leaf when you can have a whole salad?

 

Western Religion Can Only Ever Be A Stepping Stone To Truth

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Two religions, apparently at opposite ends of the spectrum, both endorsing the illusion of duality.

 

Universal Law – An Idiot’s Guide Extract #2


Here are a couple of extracts from my up and coming book Universal Law – An Idiot’s Guide, which as I type, is still on schedule to be published by the end of April. Hope you enjoy!

An Overview of Universal Law – What Exactly Is It?

self realizationUniversal Law is the means by which the universe functions. Also referred to as Spiritual Law, The Laws of the Universe, Natural Law or the Laws of Nature. It is a very precise and finely balanced mechanism that appears on the surface to be extremely complicated, but is in fact very simple.

The laws themselves can be split into three categories, each one a mirror image of the other; but unique nonetheless in its own way.

The first category of Universal Law is the laws that govern how we go about constructing the life we will lead once we take on the physical form. These laws are known as the Foundation Laws, and in the same way that foundations on Earth must be laid before a structure can be erected, so must we lay the Laws of Foundation before we incarnate.

The second category of Universal Law is the Redemption Laws that enable one to resolve outstanding issues from previous births and purify the spirit en route to Self- Realisation.

Finally, the third category of Universal Law is the Progression Laws. These are relevant to the level of progress one makes during each incarnation and ultimately determine if one attains liberation or remains within the cycle of birth and death.

The Law of Miracles

In our humanness we perceive a miracle to be the occurrence of a seemingly impossible event; for example, someone who is paralysed as the result of a terrible accident or debilitating illness, and who has been told they will never walk again, defying all the odds and doing just that. Of course, this is true; however, miracles are all this and much more.

Since the whole 2012 business (see my book Wisdom Bytes ISBN 978-1493614226) millions of people all over the planet are tangibly experiencing their own spiritual awakening, and it is only when we start to awaken that we understand that literally everything is a miracle. Simply being able to breathe or look up into the night sky and gaze upon the stars is truly miraculous. The more spiritually aware we become, the more we realise how the whole of creation is one huge miracle. We realise more and more that all is indeed God, and there is an almighty power beyond the scope of our human minds that is pulling the strings.

But the miracle of miracles is that there is nothing in the universe that is impossible. We only think in terms of the impossible because in our humanness we are unable to detach from the ego (duality) and embrace our Divinity. At the core of the Law of Miracles is the truth, that with an understanding of how creation works, all of us have the power to manifest our own miracles into our lives.